How to drive a soft bargain

Negotiator A: Well. Thanks for coming to today's negotiation. Before we start, I just wanted to say that although my Plan A is to demand £1,000, my Plan B is that if you say no then I'll take £500.

Negotiator B: I see. Thanks.

Negotiator A: OK. So. I'll kick off, shall I? I demand £1,000!

Negotiator B: No.

Negotiator A: What?

Negotiator B: No.You just said you'd take £500.

Negotiator A: Did I?

Negotiator B: Yes.

Negotiator A: Bugger.

Negotiator B: So £500 it is then?

Negotiator A: I suppose it'll have to be now.

Negotiator B: I think it will.

[Pause]

Negotiator B: [Briskly] Well! That was quicker than I expected. Would you like a lift home?

Negotiator A: No thanks.

Negotiator B: Fair enough. I expect you'll want a bit of time on your own.

[Pause]

Negotiator B: You did go to negotiating classes, didn't you?

Negotiator A: [Indignantly] Of course I did!

Negotiator B: OK, OK.

[Pause]

Negotiator B: Who was your tutor?

Negotiator A: Alistair Darling.

Negotiator B: Aaahh!

Negotiator A: What?

Negotiator B: Nothing.